RIP Captain Birds Eye
The actor who played the original Captain Birds Eye has died. No jokes about him being made into fish fingers as his last request please. Let’s show a little respect for a Captain who in 1993 was voted the most recognised captain after Captain Cook in a UK poll.
Quite an achievement but for me it puts his death in a new light. Think about it, Captain Kirk didn’t even get to second place. He must have been pretty bitter about that. I detect a motive. Where was William Shatner the night Captain Birds Eye died? I’m sure he claims he was somewhere else advertising cereal but with access to a teleporter, who knows?
That Captain Cook came first is a surprise, who would even recognise him? Now Captain Hook, that’s a different matter, he’s very memorable; curly hair, fear of clocks, massive hook obviously, very distinct. Now that I think about it, he’s another one with a motive.
Then there's Captain Caveman. Say what you like, he's a savage. Sure it's all little pink dinosaurs here and saving the day there but don't tell me that sometimes his Neanderthal rage doesn't bubble to the surface with the force of a volcano. He could have hidden the corpse in his club.
Anyway, he'll be missed.