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	<title>Alex Genn &#187; home repairs</title>
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		<title>A Cautionary Wallpaper Story</title>
		<link>http://www.lexgennblog.co.uk/2008/04/a-cautionary-wallpaper-story/</link>
		<comments>http://www.lexgennblog.co.uk/2008/04/a-cautionary-wallpaper-story/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 21 Apr 2008 15:01:00 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Alex Genn</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[decorating]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[DIY]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[do it yourself]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[home alone]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[home repairs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tea break]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[terror]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Wallpaper]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.lexgennblog.co.uk/?p=52</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[At the weekend I was scraping off wallpaper in the hallway. Beneath it there was layer of thick, bright orange rubbery paint. It was dirty and seemed to bubble of it's own accord. As I dragged the pallet knife across it I felt a shudder, I wobbled on the stepladder and almost lost my footing. [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:arial;">At the weekend I was scraping off wallpaper  in the hallway. Beneath it there was layer of thick, bright orange rubbery paint. It was dirty and seemed to bubble of it's own accord. As I dragged the pallet knife across it I felt a shudder, I wobbled on the stepladder and almost lost my footing. Unexpectedly scared and alone in the house, I decided  a tea break was in order. </span></span></p>
<p><span style="font-family:arial;">I turned to step down from the ladder and noticed the floor had gone. In its place was a choppy paper sea, </span><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:arial;">waves</span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:arial;"> of </span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:arial;">dirty yellow-white </span></span><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="font-family:arial;">rising and falling across the hall. I took my foot off the last rung and tried to find purchase on the floor but no matter how hard I stretched, all I could feel was the rough, hot, wet edges of the curled-over lining paper.  Standing at the top of a flight of stairs and aware I was over-stretching, I pulled my foot back toward the step-ladder. Or at least I tried to; but the paper had stuck to me. </span></span></p>
<p><span style="font-family:arial;">I kicked my foot a few times but again nearly lost my balance.  It was <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">like</span> the paper wanted to stick to something. No, not something, someone and not anyone, me. I suddenly knew true fear, this was not an accident, this was revenge. I had dislodged it from it's vertical life. What was it now, laying curled, worthless and ruined? Not even truly horizontal. I had done this. I would pay.</span><br />
<span style="font-size:100%;"><br />
<span style="font-family:arial;">I felt the curls of paper move around my leg and tighten. I stifled  a scream, this was stupid, this couldn't possibly be happening.</span></span></p>
<p><span style="font-family:arial;">From there, once established, the thick, suffocating scraps of paper slid up to my torso and finally enveloped my head. </span></p>
<p><span style="font-family:arial;">As it went dark and the damp, glue-covered paper filled my throat, all I could think was; I should have got a man in.</span></p>
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